- Date: July 30, 2023
- Current weight: 360.2 lbs
- Height: 5 foot 7
I have just returned from the movie theatre, a place I used to frequent weekly when my butt could easily fit into the seats, and my arms could comfortably rest within my own space. Now, the only theatres I frequent are those with leather recliners, allowing ample space to stretch.
Returning to my story, there are two parts that I wanted to share. Firstly, I knew that I would be tempted to indulge in popcorn and pop, like a Pavlovian conditioning where I right away salivate for that buttered popcorn at the very sight of a movie theatre. So, foresight was critical. My action was to come prepared with my own healthy snacks stashed in my handbag. As the saying goes “by failing to prepare, you’re preparing to fail”.
As for the movie, I watched ‘Barbie’, a film that I had heard raved about for its powerful message. Gloria’s character (portrayed by America Ferrera) laid the unrealistic expectations society places on women. Her heartfelt speech resonated deeply with me:
“It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.
You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass. You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining.
You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.
I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don’t even know.”
This honest monologue highlights the societal pressures women face, which can lead us to go to great lengths to meet these standards. It reminds me that while it’s okay to want to lose weight, it shouldn’t be for the unrealistic goal of becoming a size 0 or following unhealthy diets. It’s essential to refocus on our well-being, as it’s easy to lose sight of it in the pursuit of societal acceptance.
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